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Healthy Relationships 101: It Begins With You


A healthy relationship starts with how you feel about yourself. The level of respect you have for yourself will determine how you treat others and allow them to treat you. How you relate to yourself is based in part on your past experiences, beliefs, and thoughts about yourself. Some people find themselves in and out of bad relationships. They spend their time searching for the perfect person who, “understands” them, when in reality they do not understand themselves.

Of your past experiences, beliefs, and thoughts about yourself, the latter one is the most powerful in impacting your relationships with yourself and others. Unlike your past experiences which you cannot change, you can change your beliefs and thoughts about yourself. A healthy relationship with yourself begins with self-care in three areas: mental, physical and spiritual. Any attempt to treat one area and ignore the other areas will result in an imbalance which can cause more problems.

Self-care should not be confused with being self-centered. Rather self-care is conducted and maintained through positive means which allow you to grow stronger in confidence while doing some soul reaching about who you are, what you want, what changes you are willing to make, and most importantly, what you are willing and not willing to tolerate in your life.

In the process you will begin to create boundaries that free you to experience healthy relationships with yourself and others. You will also begin to discover how wonderful and valuable you are as a person. You will learn how to become your own best friend. Being your best friend means that you keep your promises and be honest with yourself. Don’t allow yourself to talk or thinking negatively about yourself. As you do this, you will grow stronger in your ability to hold others accountable in how they treat you in relationships.

Maintaining a healthy relationships is a continual process, one that requires constant work and dedication. It is not a “one-time fix” process that sustains you for the rest of your life and throughout all of your relationships. Just as with anything that you don’t nurture and feed, it will eventually die or diminish in value. Healthy relationships make your life fuller and richer. Cherish and nurture your relationships and watch them grow!

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